Ahhhhhh, mommy! Michael came back from the dead.

Mateo

Rafael: What the hell do you think you're doing?
Michael: Dude, she's my wife.
Rafael: She is not your wife.
Michael: Legally, she is.
Rafael: She's with me.
Michael: I got that but, I've been learning a little about my history and the way I see it, Jane was with me. And you tried to steal her away, but she still chose me. We got married, then I died, and you moved in on her. So yeah, I'm taking my wife out on a date.

Jane: Would you ever consider having more kids?
Rafael: I have three.

Jane: I just want you to know you're a good person. You deserve a good life.
Jason: I know that now. I must have been for someone like you to love me.

Jane: You know I love you.
Petra: But do you like me?
Jane: Well, yeah, mostly. I mean, do you like me?
Petra: Sometimes.

Rose: Did you come to thank me? I took out the competition. Got you the girl.
Rafael: Why did you wipe Michael's memories?
Rose: Is that really what you want to ask me? Or are you trying to find out if what I did to Michael is reversible? Afraid that if Michael gets his memory back, Jane will go running back to her one true love like she always does?

Michael: I'm out.
Jane: What do you mean you're out?
Michael: I don't wanna go through boxes of your Michael crap anymore. That's what I mean.
Jane: What, why? You can't just quit.
Michael: I'm not just quitting.
Jane: Really? Then what do you call it?
Michael: I call it walking away from a bad experience.
Jane: It hasn't exactly been rainbows and puppies for me either. At least I'm trying.
Michael: I'm trying too, but I can't do anything right. Like with Michael's stuff, you won't let me throw it away, you won't let me sell it.
Jane: Fine, do whatever you want with it.
Michael: It's not that.
Jane: Then what it is?
Michael: It's that every time I do something or say something, you're disappointed. And I get it, I'm not him. But it's also not my fault that I'm different. And River Fields made me realize that I'm the victim here. Anyway, like I said, I'm done.

Jane: Well, she had a puppy, and the puppy died. So she got a new puppy. But then, out of nowhere, the other puppy was found.
Mateo: Where?
Jane: Wandering.
Mateo: Like Moses?
Jane: No. Not like Moses. In Montana. The point is, now she has two puppies, but her parents won't let her have two puppies, so what's the plan for that?
Mateo: I don't know?
Jane: Exactly. Because there is now plan. My friend has to come up with a plan. But religion makes it seem like it will all magically work itself out which is totally false.
Mateo: It is?
Jane: Yes. You know, you may be a little too young for CCD. You're not going anymore.
Mateo: Okay. Do you think we could have the other puppy though?
Narrator: Holy hell.

Jane: Trust me, he needs that dog because he is not a people person.
*Michael laughing while talking to Jorge*
Petra: Maybe he's just not a Jane person.

Rafael: He has amnesia.
Jane: What?
Michael: Amnesia.
Jane: What?
Michael: Like no memory.
Jane: You don't remember me?
Michael: No ma'am. Jane.

Jane: So, what I was trying to say is that I rescheduled the movers for later today. Because I want to move in with you now. Not in a few weeks, not when things settle down because things never seem to settle down. And I also wanted to say thank you. Because when I think about what you did bringing Michael back, and how selfless that is, and how selfless you have been throughout this, and every day for the past four years, I love you Rafael, and I know it feels like everything's changed but it didn't. Not that.
Rafael: We are going to get through this.
Jane: We are.
Narrator: Which, of course, was the story they were telling themselves.

I know it's hard to see. But I do believe there's a plan. To all of this. And I know you are going to be okay.

Abuela

Jane the Virgin Quotes

Jane: Oh, I'm no good at this stuff. So, instead of telling you the reasons that I love you, I'm going to tell you the reasons that I don't. I don't love you because you're smart and kind. I don't love you because you're hardworking and competitive and way too defensive.
Michael: I'm not defensive.
Jane: I don't love you because you're incredibly sexy. I love you because you're my best friend and I want to grow old with you. And right now, I am confused about every single thing in my life, except you.

Rafael: No, I really think we've met.
Jane: I don't usually wear clam shells.
Rafael: Oh, the strip club on Piscayne?
Jane: Jerk.