19 Times Lucifer Charmed Us With His Wit
![](https://tv-fanatic-res.cloudinary.com/iu/cs_srgb,d_tv-fanatic-placeholder-square.png,f_auto,fl_strip_profile.lossy,q_auto:420/v1520458777/user/lisa-babick)
Who would ever have imagined that the Devil could be so much fun!
Sizzling good looks are only part of his appeal. His tongue is a magical marvel of stunning wit.
Here are our favorite Luciferisms so far. Which is your favorite?
Lucifer returns on Monday, October 2 at 8/7c on FOX. Remember to check back here for our full reviews of each episode!
There's still time to catch up with all the fun when you watch Lucifer online right here via TV Fanatic!
1. The Thing About Bad Breath...
![Bad breath](https://tv-fanatic-res.cloudinary.com/iu/s--iILCgMBa--/t_slideshow/cs_srgb,d_tv-fanatic-placeholder-square.png,f_auto,fl_strip_profile.lossy,q_auto:420/v1505514210/slides/2705/bad-breath.jpg)
Goodness me. I should've known. Halitosis. First sign of evil.
2. Satanists
![Exploring a new world](https://tv-fanatic-res.cloudinary.com/iu/s--8U0-wnOy--/t_slideshow/cs_srgb,d_tv-fanatic-placeholder-square.png,f_auto,fl_strip_profile.lossy,q_auto:420/v1460485062/exploring-a-new-world.jpg)
Why do Satanists affiliate me with goats? I don't even like their cheese.
3. Internal Radar
![Contemplating sainthood lucifer season 1 episode 11](https://tv-fanatic-res.cloudinary.com/iu/s--nK8AL_7w--/t_slideshow/cs_srgb,d_tv-fanatic-placeholder-square.png,f_auto,fl_strip_profile.lossy,q_auto:420/v1459437434/contemplating-sainthood-lucifer-season-1-episode-11.jpg)
The Devil usually has impeccable gaydar.
4. Jealousy
![Together again lucifer season 1 episode 8](https://tv-fanatic-res.cloudinary.com/iu/s--4SBzqTMd--/t_slideshow/cs_srgb,d_tv-fanatic-placeholder-square.png,f_auto,fl_strip_profile.lossy,q_auto:420/v1457746608/together-again-lucifer-season-1-episode-8.jpg)
Jealousy makes the world go 'round.
5. Deliciously Evil
![The team is back lucifer season 2 episode 1](https://tv-fanatic-res.cloudinary.com/iu/s--9WWBO47h--/t_slideshow/cs_srgb,d_tv-fanatic-placeholder-square.png,f_auto,fl_strip_profile.lossy,q_auto:420/v1473732828/the-team-is-back-lucifer-season-2-episode-1.jpg)
Sweet candy coating on the outside, delicious evil on the inside.
6. The Dead
![The dead](https://tv-fanatic-res.cloudinary.com/iu/s--KdiFpD8G--/t_slideshow/cs_srgb,d_tv-fanatic-placeholder-square.png,f_auto,fl_strip_profile.lossy,q_auto:420/v1505514449/slides/2705/the-dead.jpg)
I am amazed at the deferential respect you people have for rotting flesh.
7. Doggie Heaven
![Shooting at a fashion show lucifer](https://tv-fanatic-res.cloudinary.com/iu/s--ADG46uPi--/t_slideshow/cs_srgb,d_tv-fanatic-placeholder-square.png,f_auto,fl_strip_profile.lossy,q_auto:420/v1456090853/shooting-at-a-fashion-show-lucifer.jpg)
While all dogs go to heaven, you'll be surprised how many pigs are waiting for you in Hell.
8. Addiction
![Addiction](https://tv-fanatic-res.cloudinary.com/iu/s--GMi_ylsc--/t_slideshow/cs_srgb,d_tv-fanatic-placeholder-square.png,f_auto,fl_strip_profile.lossy,q_auto:420/v1505514662/slides/2705/addiction.jpg)
I'm like walking heroin...very habit forming. It never ends well.
9. Children
![Children](https://tv-fanatic-res.cloudinary.com/iu/s--aD1UA5lt--/t_slideshow/cs_srgb,d_tv-fanatic-placeholder-square.png,f_auto,fl_strip_profile.lossy,q_auto:420/v1505514240/slides/2705/children.jpg)
Children are hideous little creatures. Terrible, taxing burdens.
10. Therapists
![Therapists](https://tv-fanatic-res.cloudinary.com/iu/s--h-216DFh--/t_slideshow/cs_srgb,d_tv-fanatic-placeholder-square.png,f_auto,fl_strip_profile.lossy,q_auto:420/v1505514289/slides/2705/therapists.jpg)
Therapists. They really don't know anything, do they?
11. Los Angeles
![Leaving earth lucifer](https://tv-fanatic-res.cloudinary.com/iu/s--mH8MR9H8--/t_slideshow/cs_srgb,d_tv-fanatic-placeholder-square.png,f_auto,fl_strip_profile.lossy,q_auto:420/v1479669608/leaving-earth-lucifer.jpg)
Welcome to Los Angeles. City of reinvention where you can become whoever you want.
12. Drugs Are My Friend
![Loving drugs](https://tv-fanatic-res.cloudinary.com/iu/s--Dx2h6JZ1--/t_slideshow/cs_srgb,d_tv-fanatic-placeholder-square.png,f_auto,fl_strip_profile.lossy,q_auto:420/v1505516159/slides/2705/loving-drugs.jpg)
Hello. My name is Lucifer Morningstar and I… love drugs. Love them! Mmm! Yummy, yummy, yummy. Can’t get enough. And… I’ve got lots of money… mmm, that I love spending on drugs. Not even picky. I’ll do any of them. Mix them together sometimes.
13. Cats Are Gross
![Cats](https://tv-fanatic-res.cloudinary.com/iu/s--cXG7Xqcr--/t_slideshow/cs_srgb,d_tv-fanatic-placeholder-square.png,f_auto,fl_strip_profile.lossy,q_auto:420/v1505515752/slides/2705/cats.jpg)
Oh, gosh, I detest cats. Want an animal to stare at you with contempt? Get a cat. Open a bag of excrement in your house. Cat.
14. I Wannabe Like You
![Monkey see monkey do lucifer season 2 episode 7](https://tv-fanatic-res.cloudinary.com/iu/s--p2aBcCoC--/t_slideshow/cs_srgb,d_tv-fanatic-placeholder-square.png,f_auto,fl_strip_profile.lossy,q_auto:420/v1478194977/monkey-see-monkey-do-lucifer-season-2-episode-7.jpg)
People like you. They find you helpful like duct tape or a trusted socket wrench.
15. Crocs and Rubbers
![Crocs](https://tv-fanatic-res.cloudinary.com/iu/s--FsyFWMno--/t_slideshow/cs_srgb,d_tv-fanatic-placeholder-square.png,f_auto,fl_strip_profile.lossy,q_auto:420/v1505515947/slides/2705/crocs.jpg)
Oh, goody. They come in more colors. There’s only one body part rubber should be worn on.
Lucifer [about Mr. Richard’s crocs]
16. Stairway to Heaven
![Up to the penthouse](https://tv-fanatic-res.cloudinary.com/iu/s--v_AUks48--/t_slideshow/cs_srgb,d_tv-fanatic-placeholder-square.png,f_auto,fl_strip_profile.lossy,q_auto:420/v1505516051/slides/2705/up-to-the-penthouse.jpg)
Why don't we go up to the penthouse, and I can show you the original Stairway to Heaven.
17. Spandex
![Spandex](https://tv-fanatic-res.cloudinary.com/iu/s--IiS0_Wk5--/t_slideshow/cs_srgb,d_tv-fanatic-placeholder-square.png,f_auto,fl_strip_profile.lossy,q_auto:420/v1505516202/slides/2705/spandex.jpg)
I love taut spandex-wrapped backsides as much as the next chap, but that was one large helping of spiritual gobbledygook.
18. When Mom Ruins the Fun
![Ladies](https://tv-fanatic-res.cloudinary.com/iu/s--X9RWNJNy--/t_slideshow/cs_srgb,d_tv-fanatic-placeholder-square.png,f_auto,fl_strip_profile.lossy,q_auto:420/v1505516280/slides/2705/ladies.jpg)
Sorry, ladies, but it's hard for me to enjoy a triple-Decker with my mother's hands all over it.
19. Rolodex Lover
![Rolodex lover](https://tv-fanatic-res.cloudinary.com/iu/s--8WtgC5FP--/t_slideshow/cs_srgb,d_tv-fanatic-placeholder-square.png,f_auto,fl_strip_profile.lossy,q_auto:420/v1505516335/slides/2705/rolodex-lover.jpg)
I'm a lover, not a Rolodex.