Wilfred Season 1 Episode 12: "Sacrifice" Quotes
Ryan I've always had your best interest at heart, and I've never asked for anything in return...except for a bunch of stuff.
Wilfred
What? You think you can do better than undies on the face?
Wilfred
You've gotta feel how soft my tits are.
Jenna
She'll be fine. She'll probably have a team of highly trained security specialists surround her at all times. This is the Noon News we're talking about.
Wilfred
You're selling the tv? That is the corner stone of our friendship!
Wilfred
Jenna: Wilfred pooped on your lawn.
Wilfred: There is symbolism in that poop Ryan...and some grass...and half a slipper.
So this is more important than waiting for Jenna's cable guy? As we speak, Jenna is sitting at home with no Game Show Network, no MTV2, no Univision. I'm furious Ryan.
Wilfred
I'm not sure spending your days watching gruesome cat deaths on YouTube counts as protecting Jenna.
Ryan
I was gonna get it on Kindle, but then people couldn't see how deep I am.
Ryan
Well, what have we here? And what is that thing above them with the mouth and eyes?
Wilfred