He's mean, like Simon Cowell with a Pulitzer

I'm your assistant and it's my responsibility to do whatever you ask, even if it is offensive to the handicapable

My god that woman will do anything for an open bar

Marc [about Claire breaking out of prison and coming to Black & White Ball]

or i could have written in my journal cause I'm pretty sure the last thing it said was "I want to marry Lance Bass, I Love him"

Black and White ball, huh? It looks like an all white ball to me

Yoga

Marc [whispers to Wilhelmina]: Michael Bolton, not the good one
Wilhelmina: Oh hi, nice to meet you
Marc [whispers to Wilhelmina]: Bradford Meade, you're engaged to him

You gotta work for your celebrity, does Paris Hilton just get everything handed to her? Oh wait, that celubtard works hard to stay in the news

Marc

Gio: Every time you make an excuse I'm going to quack
Betty: You have no right to quack, you don't know my life. My dad is stuck in Mexico
Gio: Quack!
Betty: Seriously and my sister's fiance..
Gio: Quack!

This one almost went it, but I touched something gross on the pole

Justin [showing pictures of him playing basketball to Hilda]

Christina: Is this real? Am I pinning an endangered species here?
Wilhelmina: If you really want to feel bad I have a hat made of bald eagle

Vasquez: Sometimes I wake up, I miss my wife, sometimes my flan
Ignacio: You're insane
Vasquez: Just hungry

Amanda: Grubstank...
Henry: It's grubstick. Grubstick. Got it? It's one of the oldest and most honored names in Dutch history, which loosely translated to he who gives the fairest price for his bricks. The name is venerated and I am proud to be a Grubstick
Amanda: Did he just get really hot?
Marc: I've never been more attracted to anyone in my life

Ugly Betty Season 2 Quotes

You see this gray hair? This one is called "Santos almost died." I'm not willing to risk another one, so just sit back, relax.

Hilda

Betty: You want some cereal... shoot I forgot to get the cereal.. which okay because we don't have any milk
Justin: Don't worry about it, we're making macaroni necklaces today, I'll just eat that