The Office Season 5 Episode 26: "Casual Friday" Quotes
Michael: This is very difficult to say, but no one here like you in the office and we are going to have to let you go. [picks up phone] Hank, could you come up here please? Hank is our security guard--
Erin: Oh, I can go.
Michael: He will be ushering you out. [starts laughing]
Erin: Oh!
Michael: Oh, your face! Oh!
Erin: Is - do the people -
Michael: No, I'm kidding. No, you're not - you're not fired. Yet.
Erin: Oh!
Michael: Oh...
Erin: Do they not like me, though?
Michael: I don't know, actually.
Erin: Okay.
Pam: What about Ryan?
Michael: I don't know, I offered him his temp job back. We'll see. He was not happy at all when I offered him this job, and then I told him he didn't get the job, so-
Pam: Yeah. Maybe you shouldn't fake fire people anymore.
Michael: I don't appreciate you telling me what to do. So clean out your desk, you are through here.
Pam: Thanks, Michael.
Andy: You don't understand clothing, Toby. You're dressed like this amorphous blob of khaki.
Toby: All right, look, what you gotta understand is that when you come to work, you give up certain rights.
Dwight: Listen up, Flenderson. You're being weak and ineffectual. I'm cowboying this meeting, okay? Here are the new rules. Earth tones only. Also, women are forbidden to wear pants.
Toby: All right, come. Sit down, Dwight.
Dwight: No.
Toby: I'm running this meeting.
Dwight: That's debatable.
Toby: It's not. It's not. Sit down or I am writing you up.
Meredith: Ooh, where has this guy been?
Toby: Casual Fridays are cancelled. [everyone protests] Let's just not do it anymore.
Andy: You're running from the problem.
Toby: There's not a single appropriate outfit in this whole--except mine, quite honestly.
I have a very difficult decision to make. It's like last week I was at the video store. Do I rent Devil Wears Prada again? Or do I finally get around to seeing Sophie's Choice? It is what you would call a classic difficult decision.
Michael
Michael: I need your help. This whole Pam/Ryan debate is screwing with my head.
Jim: I don't want to be biased, but I am very close to Ryan. You know that.
Michael: You're close with Pam too.
Jim: Eh, she's nice, I guess.
Ryan: Michael gave all of our clients back to their old salespeople, so now there's not enough for both me and Pam to stay on.
Pam: He can only keep one of us as a salesperson now. He'll make his decision by the end of the day.
Ryan: I think you should get it. You really grew into it.
Pam: Oh. I think you should get it. You've changed a lot and you'd be good at it.
Ryan: If you really think that, will you tell that to Michael? That would go a long way coming from you.
Pam: Yeah.
Ryan: Thanks.
Michael: So from the bottom of my heart to the top of my heart, I am sorry.
Stanley: Are you giving us our clients back?
Michael: If we could just focus and go down the line, and everyone would say, "apology accepted," I think we would all feel better. And then we can break out my gift to you - complimentary white chocolate bark.
Stanley: Nobody likes that stuff except for you.
Michael: They wouldn't make it unless people liked it.
Erin: I really love your outfit.
Kelly: Thank you so much for saying that. I can't believe that Toby thinks this is inappropriate.
Erin: You look like J-Lo.
No matter how I look at this, I am in the wrong. And I have looked at this thing, like a hundred different ways. From my point of view, from their point of view... 98 others. And the bottom line, I am in the wrong. I'm the bad guy.
Michael
Ryan: I'm sorry you feel that way, Mr. Bart. Is there anything I can do to make things better?
Dwight: Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Give me the phone. Give me the phone.
Ryan: Exactly.
Dwight: That's my client.
Ryan: Exactly. This is your first complaint in ten years.
Dwight: Give me the phone.
Ryan: Things have been generally good.
Dwight: Give me the phone. Tell him Dwight Schrute wants to talk to him.
Ryan: Look, uh, Mr. Bart...
Dwight: Hi, Mr. Bart.
Ryan: At these prices with this service...
Dwight: Hey, it's Dwight here. Give me the phone.
Ryan: You're not gonna find this anywhere else.
Dwight: Dwight Schrute here. Hey, don't hang up.
Ryan: No, no, no. Sir, don't listen.
Dwight: I know times are tough right now, and I laud your thriftiness. [tries to pull phone out of Ryan's hand] Ryan!
Phyllis: Ryan, hand the phone over.
Ryan: Stop flustering me, everybody!
I'm just hiding out until all this stuff blows over. With Creed. Playing chess. At work. He's winning. I feel like I'm describing a dream I had.
Jim
Creed: [playing chess] No. IF you do that, I'm gonna do that. IF you do that, I'm gonna do that. IF you do this, I'm gonna do that.
Jim: Well, what if I just do this?
Creed: You don't want to do that.