The Millers Quotes
You were right about your friend. He does have the longest zoom in the business.
Waitress
Please, just stop. You're right. I'm not so great. In fact, the only reason I talk about myself so much is because I'm worried that no one else will.
Nathan
Nathan: Am I only interested in myself? I'm worried that I'm becoming a narcissist.
Carol: Well, that's ridiculous. How could a boy as smart and handsome as you, with the perfect amount of leg hair for a man, ever become a narcissist?
Kip: Yeah. I wonder.
I let Tom talk me into some stupid things, like marriage itself.
Carol
Your restaurant is the only place I've ever seen raccoons put a lid back on the trash can.
Carol
It's on every channel except for Al Jazeera .... nope. It's good to see those guys laughing.
Ray
His favorite TV show is El Seinfeld. It's a show about nada.
Debbie
I did not bring 22 pictures of Brian Williams to the barber for you to mess it up.
Nathan
You've been feeding my daughter lollipops and lies.
Metta World Peace
By the power vested in me by the state of disarray your marriage is in, I now pronounce you ex-husband and ex-wife. Til death do you stay apart.
Nathan
Tom: You're right. Our marriage does deserve a better send-off. Carol Miller, will you do me the honor of unmarrying me?
Carol: You've just made me the happiest person on earth.
Our marriage almost last 50 years, and we're going to end it with a couple of signatures, like we're renting a car.
Carol