Scrubs Season 5 Quotes
J.D.: Gloria, I need you to change the dressing on Mr. Curnses wound.
Gloria: And I need you to suck it!
J.D.: Wow Gloria! Do you kiss your great great great great great grand kids with that mouth? Zoom Zoom Zoom!
I pooped in my bed so I put it on the TV.
Jack
J.D.: I have to get ready man. I want my date with Kim to be perfect. What do you think about a romantic horseback ride on the beach?
Turk: Ooh, like you and I did for your birthday.
J.D.: Yeah but except this time with two horses.
Kim: See ya round six, wear something slutty. Zoom, zoom, zoom!
J.D.:It's mine.
Why does your TV smell like doo-doo?
Turk
Carla: Look, I feel like I can give you a list of things that are sucky about being pregnant. For starters, I am now horny as I have ever been and my husband is repulsed by me.
Turk: Listen, if you really need it that badly, I will suck it up and shut my eyes so tight and then do you.
Carla: Thank you for the sacrifice.
Turk: It's because I love you.
Elliot Reid - Moment Killer
J.D.'s Narration
(On the phone) No mom! Playpen and baby cage is not like "toe-may-toe toe-mah-toe."
Janitor
And there it was, the moment where pity was turning into genuine affection - classic Dorian.
J.D.
Elliot: Tell me every detail about the first date.
Kim: We went horseback riding on the beach.
Elliot: Ah yes, I have been on that date.
Kim: Oh really?
J.D.: What? I had a coupon.
Carla: Huh? Ya like that?
Todd: I felt it move.
Carla: Todd, you're touching your crotch.
Todd: I know, and I'm loving it.
Carla: Huh. Do you like that?
Todd: Wow. I felt it move.
Carla: Todd, you're touching your crotch.
Todd: I know. And I'm loving it.
