Parks and Recreation Season 5 Quotes
His nickname around the office is Softypants McHuggable.
April
Wanna have a baby, Traeger? Your hair, my everything else. That baby would be unstoppable.
Donna
Chris: Last year I won an organic gardening contest.
Donna: Who were you competing against?
Chris: My own taste buds.
Ben: I can't believe they're finally giving me the key to the city.
Leslie: I can't believe it took so long. They gave the key to every other mayor in the city. And none of them had as cute a butt as you.
I'll represent myself as I do in all legal matters and livestock auctions.
Ron
We should sue Jamm's parents for spawning a human turd burger.
April
Ron: I'll have number eight.
Waiter: That's a party platter.
Ron: I know what I am, son.
Thank you Mr. Swanson for your absurd opinion which you share with no one.
Leslie
You're a smart, successful young man with an adorable little belly.
Chris
Ann: Before I write that letter, you have to spend the week doing everything I say.
April: So what, I have to be your slave or something?
Ann: No, you have to be my friend.
April: Ugh, that's so much worse.
I think Mona Lisa's stealing from me!
Tom
I am 100 percent sure I am 0 percent sure of what to do.
Chris