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Doom Patrol
Thursdays on DC UniverseDoom Patrol Season 2 Quotes
Beekeeper: When your mom boffed that producer, she didn't realize that she was shackling you with chronic self-doubt. I believe she did it because she loved you.
Rita: So, that's it? We're just supposed to endure the toxic stupidity of our mothers?
The mother is gone. Soon, the father will join her. I endure.
Candlemaker
Kipling: You did it, didn't you? You opened the box. The one marked 'Do not open' on the front, the back, and the sides. All caps. Underlined.
Vic: I thought it was more of a suggestion as opposed to a hard rule.
Vic: What's with the get-up?
Rita: I'm preparing for a role in a local production. The Cloverton beekeeper has graciously agreed to let me shadow her today. I also had to subscribe to her Honey of the Month Club.
Listen, little lady. I'm a self-trained Shinobi warrior and a semi-semi-professional Fortnite streamer. So if anyone knows how to stay hidden...
The Beard Hunter
Dude: No way! A talking statue?
Cliff: I'm not a fucking statue. I'm a fucking robot.
Dude: Woah. Robot? Can you move?
Cliff: Not at the moment.
Dude: I dunno, dawg. Sounds like something a statue might say.
Larry: Hey, where's your butt mask?
Kipling: Don't need it. Got em exactly where I want them. Once they kill me, I'll initiate my plan.
Vic: Damn, they'll never suspect that.
Becoming infected by scants is extremely dangerous as the bad ideas will compound and lead to death, dismemberment, and more death.
Infovideo
Did anyone else just feel something weird go up their nose? Or is that some status quo shit around here too?
Roni
Miranda: What's up?
Roni: Well, Vic's just offered to perform surgery on me.
Miranda: Like, himself?
Larry: Anything we can do to help?
Vic: Hell, yeah! You're already dressed like doctors!
Larry: Any last words?
Valentina: Yes. If ever any fruit grows here, don't eat it.
Vic: Okay, I'm hacking the military.
Roni: What?
Vic: If I can figure out what's inside of you, I can figure out how to neutralize it.
Roni: Uh-uh. Don't you dare make me your project. I am not your redemption story, okay? And, if you're so worried about being a bad guy, how about NOT hacking the government on my behalf?