Devious Maids Season 1 Quotes
Are you sure you're gay because I could jump your bones right now?
Carmen
 
I can't afford a scandal right now. I'm in negotiations with Paramount.
Peri
Is there a nice way to tell your boss he's deformed?
Carmen
How can I be terrified of conflict? I'm married to you.
Spence
Oh, the things I've seen today. I'm going to have to go to confession twice this week.
Rosie
Please stop. I just took a Valium and you are ruining it.
Evelyn
I'm not going to hold you. I'm wearing silk and you are moist.
Evelyn
This rug is worth $100,000. If you ruin it, I will personally see that you end up in the public school system.
Evelyn
It's ironic. My life sucks, but my vacuum doesn't.
Evelyn
Okay, you can be my boyfriend. Don't get excited. It's annoying.
Carmen
I want to understand why I'm such a raging bitch.
Peri
The woman cleans tile grout for a living. If you can't shield this secret from her, you're not the brilliant degenerate I married.
Evelyn