Carlton "Lassie" Lassiter Quotes
You give me something to believe in even stronger than the NRA's code of ethics.
Lassiter: Where is Rip?
Shawn: He is somewhere in this house kicking ass in a classic game of hide and seek.
Lassiter: As of 2100 hours we are on a phase 4 lockdown!
Billy: Phase 4? What happened to the other three phases you cheap bastard?!
Lassiter: You know what happens in prison when you cry Harvard? A bunch of inmates go to the library and check out a bunch of books you've probably read before and beat you until you forget you ever went to...care to guess?
Martin: Harvard...
Lassiter: You really are smart.
Think about it Spencer, put your finger to your head and use your brain....
Why don't you go home, watch a few episodes of Sex and the City and shake this whole thing off?
Lassiter [to Juliet]
You story, much like your lunchbox, smells a little fishy.
You two are so breaking up over this.
That's why [the Innocence Project] is high on my crap list, right behind internal affairs, UNICEF and Lance Bass... don't ask
Lassiter: How many get out of jail free cards does a guy get?
Shawn: One in Chance, and another in Comminity Chess.
How may potted plants does it take to spell loser?
Carlton: I have to know, will there be a hibiscus in this design.
McNab: There would be, if it was 2004. Psh, this guy!