Eric Cartman

Eric Cartman, or simply Cartman as his friends call him, is one of the four main children in South Park.  Cartman is generally the evil mastermind of the group and is best known for his portly status.  Cartman is the only child of Liane Cartman, a single "mother" who is also Cartman's father as a hermaphodrite. 

Eric Cartman Quotes

Cartman: I can't possibly finish this whole chocolate cake by myself. Oh yes I can.
Kyle: Shut up Cartman!

It's a man's obligation to stick his boneration in a woman's separation, this sort of penetration will increase the population of the younger generation.

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South Park Quotes

Kyle: Dude, I have to save Ike! I don't even know what to do!
Stan: Well, we can't do anything now; that fat bitch won't let us!
Ms. Crabtree: WHAT DID YOU SAY?!?
Stan: I said that rabbits eat lettuce.
Ms. Crabtree: Oh. Well, yes, they certainly do...

Stan: What's gonna be for lunch today Chef?
Chef: Well, today it's Salisbury steak with buttered noodles, and a choice of green bean casserole, or vegetable medley.
Cartman: Kickass.

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